Identifying each other’s victories is the secret to a successful romantic relationship.

According to Dr. Janet Hall, a family and relationship therapist from Melbourne, Australia, the way people engaged in a relationship respond to each other’s victories or sucesses – whether in work, school or personal life – plays a very important role in a lasting relationship.

For instance, praises or celebration regarding a new promotion at work gives an emotional boost for the couple, but doing the opposite – by playing it down or ignoring it can have a negative effect which can make the relationship fragile.

To make it work, Dr. Hall suggested five ways to d this:

1. EQUAL: Treat your partner equally as yourself and by always praising or encouraging them for every successes creates a positive bond.

2. APPRECIATION: Every time you show appreciation with your partner when he praises you is a fun way to benefit both parties. It is like showing gratitude every time.

3.BEING POSITIVE ALWAYS: Always say positive things like praises or congratulations while avoiding saying bad or negative things on each other; even on their backs.

4. RECOGNIZE SMALL STEPS: Acknowledging every small step your partner takes to reach the goal is better than congratulating him after the goal has been reached. The process is always better than the outcome and after all, if the process is enjoyed, it reflects in the job done.

5. TAKE A LOOK AT OTHER THINGS: When you have a hard time looking for positive things to say, don’t fret. Just take a good and observant look around you to find other positive things in your relationship and focus on that.

Source: Reader’s Digest Magazine, September 2007.